Onion Ring for Sale

Onion Ring must go. I'm advertising for new flat mates today. Again she was banging on my door for 20 minutes at 11.30 last night. She was totally off her trolley and had tripped going outside for one of her contraband balcony cigarettes. She banged her head on the handle and she was covered in blood. Great. I just snapped that she needed to clean herself up and go to the emergency room and left her to it. I'm mean and cold but I can't be dealing with her. She got back in at 2.00 in the morning. I haven't spoken to her. All I know is that there are black spots all over my carpet, blood splattered across my freshly cleaned windows, on my white flowers and urn. There is a big pool of blood that has stained the paintwork on the doorstep to the balcony that I'll clearly need to sand and re-paint on my one day off this weekend. I'm tired of the Onion Ring and her issues. I accidentally bumped into her in the lift as I got home at 10.30 last night. She stood in the foyer of our building crying like a a slobbery, snotty freak show because she didn't get another job she went for yesterday. People saw me with her. I'm so embarrassed.

Anyone looking for a freakish flatmate? Anyone looking for a lovely flat to live in? I promise all remnants of the OR will be eradicated before you move in.

Floss. x